Friday, November 30, 2012
The Healing Journey of a Painting...
The idea for this painting came to me after I discovered some old negative energy patterns within me that I wrote about in this blogpost. Suddenly I had this vision of this hand pulling out what appeared to be a weed with it's attached roots, the weed and the roots representing the old negative energy patterns. As I played with the idea the hand became two hands as a set of wings pulling the old negative belief patterns from my third chakra, or power center.
I had a painting of a background sitting around that just wasn't working for me, much like those old negative belief patterns. I decided to wipe the slate clean and gesso the background. Gesso is like an artist's primer, it primes the surface for whatever medium you might apply to it. If you don't like a painting or drawing you are working on you can always gesso and/or paint over it. Similarly, if you don't like the way your life is working out or some of the limiting beliefs that you have, wipe the slate clean and start again. On the clean slate I wrote out some statements about those negative beliefs, such as "I bless you inadequacy and I lovingly release you from my body and my life. Blessing something you no longer want in your life and lovingly releasing it from your life is a technique Louise Hay writes about in The Power is Within You. I have added the part about releasing it from your body because those energy blocks and patterns sit in your body as well so it is important to release them to get the energy flowing again.
After I wrote those statements down and freed myself of the ties that have bound me to those old energy patterns in charcoal pencil I gessoed over it again which gave it a gray tint. Then I busted out the paints and began painting with my fingers over the surface. I did not plan on leaving any of the gray visible but once I had a couple of spots of gray surrounded by the aqua I decided it was a good idea to leave it. It is symbolic of how those things that no longer work for us can add to the beauty of what we are now creating as long as we let them go.
I love the clump of dirt with the straggly roots, as the roots are the words of the old negative energy patterns and the painting represents pulling those out of my power center by the roots. I also love how, without even intending it, the clump wound up being an upside down heart, telling me that there is love even in the negative beliefs. They are simply reminders of Who We Are Not, sent to ourselves in love so that we can remember Who We Are. I decided to write "i forgive" on that clump of old beliefs, forgiving others and also forgiving myself for believing them. Is that a necessary step? It depends. If we are hard on ourselves then we might resent ourselves for believing in such limiting thoughts. If you simply say to yourself that you forgive yourself for believing those thoughts you will feel whether or not it is necessary for you as you will feel a heaviness inside of yourself if it is needed or you will not feel anything at all which means it is not.
The hands, how I love the hand prints that are wings as they remind me that Divine Intelligence, my Soul, Life, and myself are all co-creating the release of these negative energy patterns from my body and my life. It is one of my favorite parts of the painting. The words came to me at the end of the painting, "You are Free...Now You can love You."
Sometimes limiting beliefs get in the way of your loving ourselves. If we believe we are unworthy, why would we give love to what is unworthy? We do not need to prove our worthiness as our existence is all the evidence of it that we need. But limiting beliefs form based on our experiences and they block our ability to see that we are worthy, we are adequate, we are deserving. Once these patterns have been identified they can be processed, healed, and released leaving us feeling free to give ourselves the love that we were always worthy and deserving of. Allowing ourselves to live our dreams and create the lives we have always desired but didn't know if we were worthy of having.
This painting represents taking the ashes of my life, the ashes of old limiting energy belief patterns, and sculpting it as a beautiful piece of art as a reminder of where I have been, out of appreciation for that place, and as a constant reminder of how I have healed and continued to move forward. What ashes can you take and make into a beautiful reminder of how you have healed?
With light and love,